3.25.2010

Conversation

What do you do during a conversation? Listen intently, daydream, think of a response in your head while the other person is still talking, write a grocery list?

For me I am desperately thinking why did I leave my journal at home, two, will I remember this conversation by the time I get back home and, three, I am writing down this conversation in my imaginary journal that I keep in my head. It's located in the far back corner of my mind (it's next to indifference & dirty thoughts).

This afternoon’s conversation, I am at the park with my daughter playing on the monkey bars (she excels at them and she's only four). On the far end of the monkey bars is a five-year-old boy with his Papa watching next to him. His Papa and me get into general conversation. Me “Photographer". Papa “retired". Me, “Nice weather". Papa “Yep”.

I typically hate small talk for the reason that I am no good at it. General politeness from strangers makes me uncomfortable. I have this odd dichotomy of being an introvert and an extrovert. I know what you're thinking…. it's conflicting being me. I am very comfortable speaking in front of a crowd and extremely uncomfortable being in a crowd. Then mix in small talk and I shrivel up like a scared little turtle.

A school bus stops leaving off a group of high school kids. Papa looks at me and says “I watched my eldest grandson get off that bus for the past three years with his backpack on his shoulder. Next week I will watch him get on a plane to Afghanistan with an AK47 strapped to his back.”

Me…"God Bless."