8.21.2008

Solitude

During conception, in the womb, and through the first years of life we are always accompanied with companionship. Even in dreams we are guided by some force or narrative. It is not our nature to be alone. Why do I crave solitude? The economy of space and silence within my own understanding is the immersion of liberation that haunts me. Caustic pain of seclusion, it’s my lure, it’s my mistress. A palette of time, observation and study of myself, my environment is considered necessary. People are noise, I need quiet to grow.

11:02pm: rice timer beeps, lunch for tomorrow. Last hint of headache lingers in my temples; my tongue is dry, rice smells sweet. My wife and daughter sleep. Is this solitude?